Friday, November 26, 2010

Raising awareness about the mom jean.

You asked and therefore you shall receive. 

A while back now.  In fact ashamingly long ago, I hosted a mom jeans party.  You may ask yourself, what is a mom jeans party. Or what are mom jeans.  I would be disappointed in you, but I will answer anyways.  Mom jeans are jeans that are NOT flattering to the female form.  They can take several forms.  As demonstrated below.

You may ask, what prompted you to have this awesome and incredibly creative mom jeans party.  Well, there were several inspirations for this mom jeans party. 

1.     I own a pair of mom jeans , for just such an occasion.
As a side not I got stung by a bee earlier that day, you can see it on my chest.  
2.     I believe everyone should own a pair of mom jeans and by holding a party that requires people to buy mom jeans, I can help this belief come to fruition. 
3.     Have you seen this video.
It is good and you will now watch it.
4.     I love having theme parties and wearing costumes and this was an excuse to do both. 

What makes a good mom jean?

1.     A least a 9 inch zipper.  Please refer to the video or provided photo for the scale of what this means.
9 inch zipper, mmm hmm
2.     Preferably a tapered leg, with boochy (boo-chee)  hips.  Yeah I made up boochy, but it describes what is happening perfectly so don’t argue with me, and intergrate it in your normal vocabulary.  If you could refer to the pictures below and view what I mean by boochy. 

Footnote:  I just looked up Boochy on urban dictionary, and apparently it means frequent user of cocaine. Just wanted to warn you, but we all know what it really means.   

3.     An acid wash.

4.     Very tiiiiiight or very loose fitting (boochy).  Nothing in between. 
Tight on the left, boochy on the right.  
5.     Lumbar support.  Mom’s carry babies, groceries, and other mom things.  They can have back pain.  If the pockets come up onto the back it can provide quite a bit of support I found out.
Look how much support their backs are receiving!

On a last note, I think mom jeans are making a come back.  But I think people are wearing them ironically, please google hipster if you need more information about people wearing things ironically.  Hipsters wear things such as fanny packs, mom jean shorts, glasses without lenses (oh wait).  Anyways, that is a whole other subject that I don't feel like talking about.

What I want you to be aware of when choosing to wear mom jeans ironically if whether or you can pull them off.  I will now provide you with two examples.  You tell me who pulled it off and who didn't.

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