I thought I would break my silence with a guest blog. This is a blog from my friend Susie Weller. We played soccer together in college and got in lots of trouble together. She actually wrote this a while ago, but I am a huge slacker and have not put it up for no good reason. This blog is an addition to the list of types of bitches that was found in an elementary school in the DC area. The list can be found here. http://andiamnotlying.com/2010/types-of-bitches/ As you can see 44-58 are missing, Susie has filled in that gap.
Types of Bitches
Bitches who you can’t see where they lookin cuz they cross-eyed
Bitches who be leavin their phone, wallet, sunglasses, and coats everywhere
Bitches who be tappin their fingernails on counters
Bitches who be cluckin on the phone in line
Bitches with yappy ass dogs
Rhinestone-iphone carrying bitches
Bitches who be poppin a squat in public
Bitches who always be suckin on blow pops
Bitches who be wearin rompers even tho they know they give ‘em camel toes
Bitches with baby hands.
Ugly bitches who stay skinny to make up for it
Flat chested bitches
Big booby bitches
Big booby bitches who look down on flat and medium chested bitches
Dinner plate nipple bitches
Stuffin’ their bras bitches
Bitches with five heads
Paleolithic lookin’ bitches
Bitches who jealous of me cuz they know I prettier than them
Asian bitches who only like things that are miniature
Miniature sized bitches
Bitches who ain't got no sense of humor and look down on me for writing a list about bitches
My one addition to the types of bitches is "Adult braces wearing bitches."
Stay tuned more blogs to come. I saw David Sedaris last night and I intend to journal and be just like him when I grow up.
I have you missed you my pretties!
Kitty Diamonds (Bitch who be cluckin' on her phone in line)